Have u ever wished your partner came with an instruction booklet???

You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.Whenever am with my few people I love,the other few are in other corner and I then wish if only we could get all the people in the world that we really like and just stay together!!!But it doesnt happen;either life makes them to say us goodbye or we make them to say us goodbye. There's one sad truth in life I've found while journeying in life - The only folks we really wound are those we love the best. We flatter those we scarcely know, we please the fleeting guest, and deal full many a thoughtless blow to those who love us best. 
When I was a child,we  used to think,kingdom of happiness would never end.But as we grow up,we realise there are not only other worldly affairs but we should make an effort for our relationships also.And the most exciting,significant and challenging one is the one we have with ourself and if we can find someone to love us the way we love ourself,it's just fabulous.We mistakenly assume that if our partners love us they will react and behave in certain ways - the ways we react and behave when we love someone. When men and women are able to respect and accept their differences then love has a chance to blossom.You meet someone and you're sure you were lovers in a past life. After two weeks with them, you realize why you haven't kept in touch for the last two thousand years.But we forget we need to be  the kind of person we would like to be with. While growing up,seeing people around making up and breaking up,I used to think am not gonna be the  forgiving types or the one who gonna keep patience in a relation.Guess,with time,perspective changes,we mature not only age-wise but we learn to  weigh things and handle things in a very different way than we always used to think of.Probably down the line,I might feel I was a fool now but as of now thats my secret for a successful relationship.I have learnt to forgive and forget,I have learnt to let-go those people who just create differences and I have learnt that a relationship is my very own private affair.I have read in every magazine the 10 things for a perfect love life.Probably in todays world a lot of add-ons are required to validate the love in a relation but I still do believe in the age old theory that there is no two-ways about unconditional love.

I feel COLD

Its pleasant here in Kolkata but I miss Bangalore weather.I miss the cloudy days,I miss the evening rains,I miss the chilly breeze at night.The weather in bangalore is delicious.The whole world goes to grief in winter but for me its the most gifted time of the year.Since my childhood,I have been rejoicing at this season of the year.Its the perfect time of the year for dressing up,for sipping hot coffee,for hiking,for partying.And I miss my winter days in Madrid.Thats the only winter snow I have experienced in my life till date.I wish to stay in a place where  the winter would in full swing;the leaves would wither away only after turning yellow and brown,where the snow flakes would shower on me,where I can wear high boots and trench coats.May be people surviving in snow lands may think that am a crazy person but I feel am an out n out a winter person.Snow is magical for me,I would feel like walking on the clouds.

When in winter you can see the bones of the landscapes,I am trying to see the skeleton of my relationships and pondering over them.And the exact state of my mind is confusion.Is it true that our intellect may be confused but our emotions will never lie or it is the other way.What I really want!!!Can I bridge the gulfs???With a lot of naked realities in front of me,I feel the winter is here,I really feel cold.

I also have a Love Story

I dont pretend to know what love is for everyone but I can tell you what it is for me;love is knowing all about someone and still wanting to be with them more than any other person,love is trusting them enough to tell them everything about yourself,including the things you might be ashamed of,love is feeling comfortable and safe with someone,but still getting weak knees when they walk into a room and smile at you.Sometimes when one person is missing,the whole world seems depopulated.
Too often we don't realize what we have until it's gone,too often we are too stubborn to say,"sorry,I was wrong".Too often it seems we hurt the ones closest to our hearts and we let the most foolish things tear us apart.Its like dark chocolate.Although it always leaves you with bitter taste in your mouth,you will still be tempted to take a bite the next time around.Its heaven but can even hurt you like hell.In love I hold the passion of an Italian lover and loyalty of a Chinese wife.

To sum up love for me,its madness,when love is not madness;its not love.

If I never thank God after every smile,then I have no right to blame him after every tear

Today I choose to live with gratitude for the love that fills my heart,the peace that rests within my spirit,and the voice of hope that says all things are possible.I feel optimisim,calmness and self control within me.It cant be more me-er than me.I like this avatar.The old emotional avatar-strong is back.And I Thank God for this.I hate it when am a cry-baby.With positive energies around you,you feel everything around you is beautiful...the weather,the songs,the people.I feel blessed today coz I dreamt of God and I dreamt of checking in at John F Kennedy International Airport.Hope this dreams come true soon.I really cant wait.All of a sudden again this dream of going abroad is swirling inside me.Well the world is beautiful today and thing which is beautiful is shopping and am day dreaming of some shopping going with the trends.

I dont dream of a Jeannie,all I dream is of my closet filled with happy dresses and shoes and bags.See those to-die for heels.I know its not good for body but a shoe is definitely ugly if it doesnot hurt.I am nowhere near perfect.I eat when I'm bored.I fall for boys easily at times.I'm vulnerable to believing lies.I am hoping that one day I wont need a fake smile.I live by the quotes that explain what I'm going through.I make up excuses for everything.I have best friends and enemies.I have drama and memories.But am perfectly worth these shoes.So the hunt begins for my dream Cindrella shoes and no I dont want any prince to find me a pair,I love going for my treasure hunt all by myself.

A Beautiful world 4 U n 4 Me

 I certainly wish that kissing frogs would lead me to a prince, or that eating a mysterious apple would poison me, or that with the magical "Bibbity-Bobbity-Boo" I would get a beautiful dress and a pumpkin carriage. I also wish that looking in a mirror and saying "Candyman, Candyman, Candyman" will make some awful serial killer come after me..But wishes are only granted in fairy tales.Ironically,its even true that if you believe in fairy tales,you will face life easier.
When I was a little girl I used to read fairy tales. In fairy tales you meet Prince Charming and he's everything you ever wanted. In fairy tales the bad guy is very easy to spot. The bad guy is always wearing a black cape so you always know who he is. Then you grow up and you realize that Prince Charming is not as easy to find as you thought. You realize the bad guy is not wearing a black cape and he's not easy to spot; he's really funny, and he makes you laugh, and he has perfect hair.But I know my Prince Charming is always there besides me protecting me from the bad guy.
Everybody has that point in their life where you hit a crossroad  and you've had a bunch of bad days and there's different ways you can deal with it and the way I dealt with it was I just turned completely to love stories and fairy tales.They exists only in books perhaps but I believe in miracles and I believe someday my dreams will all come true.

I am intimidated by the fear of being average,by getting lost in the crowd.I want to be lucky enough to be different,to change my own stars.Probably destination and destiny is always not the same but I want to be clothed in strength and dignity and laugh without the fear of the future.I believe happy girls are the prettiest girls.Its just about doing good and believing in good.All I aim in life is to just be a better person and make this a beautiful world for u and for me and for the all the loved ones.This is one life we have and it should be a paradise on earth.And my start begins here.I promise here,we will lead a stress free,peaceful life no matter how many stones life throws at us.I dont know the secret of living life but I just know I want to be happy.

I Luv My BRAT

Some women choose to follow men and some women choose to follow their dreams.If you're wondering which way to go,remember that your career will never wake up and tell you that it doesn't love you anymore.But ROMANCE - nothing like it.My whole world revolves around my life and I can do anything to do to see him happy.

"I have been astonished that men could die martyrs for their religion
I've shuddered at it
I shudder no more.
I could be martyr'd for my religion.
Love is my religion
And I could die for that
I could die for u"-John Keats

Life has never promised us anything..Nor has God.But people did.Some said they will neva leave you...LIE,sum said they will luv u till death...LIE,some said u r the most precious one..LIE.Life is made of such sweetest lies.All that matters is how u faced the time u finally realised those were just lies.We may ask,"Wouldnt life be much better without these lies??"But in truth,the times u lived on those big lies were the only times u lived.Life is never perfect but am a perfectionist and I idealise Mills & Boons,Romeo & Juliet.So I want my life story to be "happily ever after starts here".I want real love,ridiculous inconvenient consuming cant live without each other love.We fight crazily and so do we love insanely. I will achieve my dream suppressing all the flaws of our relation ; actually am mistaken here,we both will make that happen.

And talking bout love,I have the loveliest parents,another mother am blessed with now.I Thank God immensely for the blissful life and pray to him to help me keep my magical life in a smile-always situation forever.Touche n Amen!! I shudder with the thought of loosing these 4 people.I always wanna be the "manna dew" in their life,as they are to me.

LUV SHACK or SHAKE

Stress is injurious to health as smoking is.Recently,I have been very overstressed and my mind has been clogged to put anything into words.I feel pressure is mounting on me.There's a downward tug this month and am like a yo-yo in fate's hand.Everybody seems very demanding,including situations and am not being able to cope up with.At times,I wish I can ran away from this world and go into the wilds.Other times I jus pray my head is smashed in some car accidents.Everyday so many people die,y dont I ??!!!?? I have neva been a sort of pessimist but right now everything in my life seems to be out of my control.I jus need a miracle to lead a good and peaceful life.String of situations making me loose faith,control and temper.And all these makes me paranoid bout marriage.I am the type of person to adjust everything for the person I love and give my best to work out anything in my life.My world revolves around my love.At times I feel being such an extremist is also abnormal.But I can neva work out a midway.Then I wonder,all the lovely couples,holding halds and hugging and posing pictures,are all their lives perfect,polished and chique or its a virtual life they lead!!I neva want a virtual and a compromised life for myself.Do we marry someone we can live with or someone we cannot live without??!!!??There are so many unanswered questions and no google or agony aunt can solve the puzzle of my mind.Besides this tug of war am partying crazily.Last Saturday it was LoveShack with Satish and Roshni,met a couple of new people as well.Sunday and Monday have been two of the best days of my life with Rahul.We drank like sponge and watched crazy movies like Wrong Turn 4.Insane fun it was.Lost our parking ticket at UB City but enjoyed every bit of it.It was a state of elation.Start of the week,Satish really helped me flushing out my toxins and we did some crazy hunting and the picture here is the result.Yesterday night was again at Loveshack and lolz people cant stop teasing me coz every 2nd day am there.And any new people I meet its there.For every thing my answer is Loveshack.It was a fun nite.I met Sunny.In the beginning he seemed a strange guy to me but I think he is a sweet and a warm person.Thanx Vicky for the Wednesday night.But it ended again in my mood spillovers.Lets see where and how far it takes me.It gets so nerve-wrecking at times I feel,Monday should be end of everything.I need to find an end or a new begining.

I'm a Blackbelt in Shopping

 Like any other girl,I luv shopping.But as am an extremist I love it to some level of insanity.Any product in my mind and the only thing I cannot resist is my temptation.Products speak to me,they connect with my brains,my heart and every thought of mine and I cannot rest in peace when I leave them alone in the store.I feel satisfied when they are in my closet.If I have no money,I would rather abandon eating but not shopping.If I could be paid for shopping,I would definitely take it up professionally.Well,I love shopping alone,when I dont have to worry about the other person with me,his or her comfort level,whether he or she in hurry or needs to grab a bite.I fight with my boyfriend,I have nowhere to go,friends are out of town and I know the remedy for everything..SHOPPING.I am elated the moment I shop.Be it clothes,shoes or accessories,anything can be a prey to my fantasies.I would never like 2/3rd of my wardrobe later or neva use them the 4th time but I luv decorating them in my closet.My latest obsession is cosmetics,more precisely lip colors. Mauve and pinks are my types.Today also,in between hanging out with friends I added a few more to my collection.My dream is to own a walk-in closet and am sure am not too far from that.

GREAT MOMENT IT IS !!

20th Oct,my whole family was coming down.Mixed emotions I had.I was happy that I would be able to be with them.I was excited that Frooty will be here too : )) I was tensed coz my family was gonna meet Rahulz.I was sad coz I will have less time for Rahul.I guess its all part of growing up or am I the only confused soul !!At times I feel I love my loneliness and other times I cry my heart out for my parents.There are times which makes me think am not a relationship person and this marriage thingie will take a toll on me.Then there are times,I wanna cherish every facet of life.Am jus being paranoid now.

So thursday evening,everyone was here,the service apartment at Indiranagar was brimming with sounds.
Most excited was Frooty,she always wanted to come to Bangalore,to the place where her Mimi (me) lives.She started her disneyland trip by feasting at McD's.

Friday evening we all had to go to Rahulz place.I was tensed as much I have never been for my exams.Our car broke down in middle and we had to walk half the way.Finding autos in Bangalore is like a lucky charm!!Finally after the whole lotta traffic n mishaps,we reached and by God's grace,all went well.

Saturday trip was cancelled coz my aunt fell sick but it ended well coz we gave Frooty a small surprise birthday party.This concept of surprise party was quite enthralling to her.

Sunday also was quite pleasant and full of warmth at Mamajiz place.The way I never expected,everything went smoothly.After which I got some grace time with Rahul and we had Sunday evening to ourselves after all the family talks.The weekend ended well with a scrumptuous spread of Bengali cuisine at Indrani masiz place.

Monday I took my parents and Frooty to Banerghatta National Park and butterfly park.Tomorrow Frooty is leaving with Bomma and Tutu and me gonna miss her and her charms.









So now I have full time with my parents.Its DIWALI time too.Double celebrations.We spent our day at Mithaiz and went to Rahulz place for puja and dinner.After dropping everyone home,I went to Loveshack.First time it was a desi karaoke night.We had our own after party.                                                                                  

Dad,Mom,Auntie n myself,we went to Tandoori Hippie for dinner one night.Parents were very happy to see Rahulz workplace and this was the day when Rahul could really give them some time.
Thanx to Mama n Mamiji,we even had dinner at Casa Raviera.The family time was very pleasant and more sweet than I could have imagined.Lucky to have such families.Touche!!




The month looked like never ending festivities with HALLOWEEN on the row.We watched Ra.One and celebrated our halloween at Toit.










Celebrations were never ending because I was with all the people I love.
Parents left for Kolkata last morning and am sulking.The purpose for their visit was to meet Rahulz family and it all went like a dream.Time flew fast.I cherished each and every time on personal level.Bonds jus get sweeter.I wish,if only I could bring all the people we love and we all could stay together.A different and a great experience all-together.Luv u MA n BABA.